men are taught not to cry

and so was i.

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

do you remember how it felt to cry

and be comforted in response

to your teardrops?

i cannot recall something

that never happened to me,

so i like to ask others who

have a memory to

fall back upon.

was it calming?

i imagine it being dreamy.

i treat myself the way

i wish my parents did — which is to say

that i say, “ alayna,

i love you.”

“alayna,

i miss you.”

“alayna,

i am proud of you.”

but when it comes to dewdrops

that fall from my tearducts,

i still don’t know how

to let myself cry

because i was never comforted

in response to my teardrops.

☽