tears well up in my eyes

and i tell them to stop.

Photo by Conor Sexton on Unsplash

tears start to well up in my eyes

and i tell them to stop.

i tell them not yet.

i tell them

not here.

not now.

hold on.

don’t make a sound.

a lot of what i say to myself is an echo

of something someone else said to me first.

it often feels like a curse.

but the most baffling part of it all

is that i want to let it all out.

i’d like to cry.

the release is worth

the puffy pink cheeks.

but i can’t because i won’t let myself.

not yet. not here. not now.

☽